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 I'm Kimmy Miller and I wonder if you've ever wrestled with the ugly green eyed monster of Envy like I have I wonder if you too at some point or another ever wished your circumstances look more like someone's those over there you know where the grass is greener and the flowers a little brighter I keep hoping that I will outgrow it and reach this point of maturity or I no longer struggle with comparison but so far it hasn't happened and that just the other day I was scrolling through my social media feed and I saw than old friend of mine had just launched a new website for her ministry as much as I want to tell you that my first reaction was pure joy for my friend I'm embarrassed to say that it wasn't I clicked on that link that took me to her beautiful new site with cool fonts fresh new colors and slick hyperlinks and I immediately compared it to my own site now appearing less than mediocre in my eyes and before I knew it my thoughts were off and I couldn't
 all the men and they were coming up with excuses as to why mine looks like a do-it-yourself project gone wrong and how I need to revise my look if I was going to compete with her and by the way who does she think she is anyway showing off with a brand new I'll be it gorgeous website and just as quickly as that thought came to mind I was smacked with this one Timmy stop it you shouldn't think like that you're supposed to be happy for her and here's where I struggle I know how I should respond but that's not always my first inclination and being caught between what I want to be true and what I know to be true often leaves me feeling uncomfortable like wearing a shirt with crooked stitching that doesn't quite fit right
 but I keep wearing it because well I don't know I probably got it on sale or something but the thing is getting back to my comparison problem I know God's truth I know that God has good plans for me and for my friend
 but sometimes I just can't get past my own thoughts I don't want to admit that I have fought like this because well they make me feel ashamed
 I'm feeling ashamed only makes me want to cover them up like sleeping them under the rug only to trip on them later but just because I don't want to think this way doesn't mean that I don't and pretending me thoughts don't exist well that's fake and I don't know about you but I just can't do fake anymore I want to be authentic and I think you do too that's why we're here right talking about the things that are keeping us in slavery from being our beautiful authentic self
 so let's talk about it let's talk about comparison because whether you want to admit it or not we all do it
 think that it we compare grocery we compare the price of gas we compare schools we compare neighborhood but what trips us up is what we forget about the working behind the scenes and that's our knowledge of Good and Evil that knowledge we acquired way back in the garden that helps us to determine what's right and what's wrong see we often talked about having the knowledge of evil identifying what's bad or harmful but we don't ever really talk about the knowledge of good
 and here's the thing if we know what's good then we know what's better and surely we know what is best and this is where things get tricky
 when we compare we're looking to find similarities how are they alike what's the same but what happens when our knowledge of good takes over and suddenly we're no longer just comparing we're deciding who wore it better
 now we're judging so not only may we be wrestling with Envy but now we're duking it out with judgement and pride and it's no wonder that we're shaming ourselves in the corner for having such thoughts
 the friend I want you to give yourself Grace Envy judgement Pride those are all thin and we're all wrestling with sin this just happens to be one of its many colors I wish I could tell you have discovered the secret to never comparing and judging others or myself but I haven't
 what I have found is out the combat it and this crazy comfort and knowing that I'm not alone struggling with comparison isn't new in fact the Apostle Paul who wrote most of the New Testament addresses this very thing in the first book of Corinthians they too were arguing and comparing spiritual gifts arguing about which one was more important than the other and Paul uses the analogy of our bodies to help us see the importance each one of us is to the body of Christ and how each has a unique design and purpose that really can't be compared
 in chapter 12 starting with verse 12 he right just as a body the one has many parts but all its many parts form one body so it is with price for we are all baptized by 1 so as to form one body weather Jews or Gentiles slave or free and we are all given the one Spirit to drink even so the body is not made up of one part but of many now if the foot should say because I'm not a hand I do not belong to the body it would not be for that reason stop being part of the body and if the ear should stay because I'm not an I do not belong to the body it would not for that reason stop being part of the body if the whole body were an I wear with the sense of hearing be if the whole body were an ear where would the sense of smell be
 but in fact God has placed the parts in the body every one of them just as he wanted them to be
 if they were all one part where would the body be
 as it is there are many parts but one body the I cannot say to the hand I don't need you and the head cannot stay to defeat I don't need you on the contrary those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor and the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty well our presentable Parts need no special treatment but God has put the body together giving greater honor to the parts that lack that says that there should be no division in the body but that it's part should have equal concern for each other if one part suffers every part suffers with it if one part is honored every part rejoices with it now you are the body of Christ and each one of you is part of it
 I don't know if you've ever stop to really Marvel at The Wonder of your body and how it all works together or like me you take it for granted and only notice when it's not working
 but when I do take time to appreciate it to appreciate anyting I'm humbled with gratitude
 cut really did think of everything
 and I believe the key to appreciation has to be rooted in love
 in fact Paul Road about that too
 in Chapter 13 of the same letter to the Corinthians
 you probably heard it referred to as the love chapter or heard it read at a wedding hall stresses the importance of love he writes love is patient love is kind it does not envy it does not boast it is not proud it does not dishonor others it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs love does not Delight in evil but rejoices with the truth it always protects always trusts always hopes, always perseveres
 you see we have to start with love
 when we know how much we are loved by God it becomes easier to love others it becomes easier to cheer them on Love Somehow erases the need for competition love says we can all win even when we still battle with sin
 my initial thoughts are not always grounded in love but I'm learning to recognize those that are not so I can replace them with those that are
 and here's what I'm learning
 when I'm finally honest about my thoughts like really honest then Jesus and I can work our way through them
 this isn't always easy for me because like I said before I'm often ashamed by them I know they aren't Christian like but if I want to be more Christ minded then I have to acknowledge the thoughts that aren't
 because then we got and I can take those thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ just like dealing with any spin I have to admit it
 the friend I give you permission to admit that you had that thought admit that you wanted to be the one who is point out for your success admit that you wanted to be the one with the new car the new website admit that you wanted what they had admit that you didn't want the cards you've been dealt admit all of it it it all out there and if you're like me I think that longing is authenticity you don't just want to do what you should you want to do it because you believe it
 because it's become part of your core values because it's who you are because it's who Christ died for you to become
 and if no one else has told you today dear one you are incredibly special
 you aren't meant to be like anyone else from the color of your eyes to the way your pinky finger slightly curved inward God designed everything about you with purpose
 and he did that for all of us
 he gave us each talent and skills that are unique to our path and when I'm tempted to compare myself to others I remind myself of this truth found in Psalm 139
 are you created my inmost being you knit me together in my mother's womb I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made your works are wonderful I know that full well my frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place when I was woven together in the depths of the earth your eyes saw my unformed body all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be how precious to me are your thoughts oh God how abast is the sum of them
 Ore-Ida count them they would outnumber the grains of sand see the reality is we are all different doing different things we were all designed to be a unique reflection of God and when I dwell on the great extent of love and thought God went to to make up each one of us I'm overwhelmed and my thoughts are transformed
 instead of envying others it frees me to genuinely celebrate with them instead
 perhaps that's where authenticity begins in that place where we give ourselves permission to be honest about what we're thinking and the grace to admit it
 it's there I think that Jesus did some of his best work
 so let's stop beating ourselves up for getting caught up in the comparison trap
 let's just admit we can all be a little chunk fish with our spots so we can ask Jesus for help so we can be the different he made us to be
 so we can be those recognized by our love for one another those who can genuinely say I'm so happy for you
 and mean it
 would you pray with me
 but I thank you for your unique design
 each and everyone of us I thank you that we get to see how creative you are in everything that you do
 may we look upon others
 and celebrate
 all the diversity that is around us
 I break off Every curse of comparison in Jesus name and asked instead holy spirit that you would fill those places with enjoy love and admiration of a God that does and makes marvelous things in Jesus name I pray amen
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